The first night in their own room, the first hours at the nanny's, the first days at daycare, or starting kindergarten... Each separation is a significant milestone, for both the baby and their parents.
While some children adapt quickly, others need familiar landmarks to feel secure. Good news: a few simple objects can make all the difference.
Discover why transitional objects are so precious and how to choose those that will accompany your child through these moments of separation.
1) Why are separations sometimes difficult?
From the first months, babies form a strong attachment bond with the people who care for them.
Around 8 to 18 months, what is known as separation anxiety often appears. At this age, babies understand that their parents exist even when they can no longer see them… but they don't yet know when they will return.
This stage is normal and indicates healthy emotional development.
To navigate this period more serenely, familiar objects play an essential role.
2) What is a transitional object?
Pediatrician and psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott popularized the term transitional object. Winnicott, D. W. (1953). Transitional Objects and Transitional Phenomena. International Journal of Psychoanalysis, 34, 89-97.
It is an object that the child chooses to symbolically represent the connection with their parents when they are absent.
This can be:
- a comforter/lovey;
- a swaddle blanket;
- a small blanket;
- a soft cushion;
- sometimes even a plush toy or a small doll.
These objects become true everyday companions. They carry scents, textures, and habits that remind them of home and provide a sense of security.
> The comforter: the classic that accompanies emotions
The comforter is often the first companion chosen by baby.
It is present at bedtime, during naps, during travels, at the nanny's, at daycare, and even into the first years of school.
Its familiar scent, softness, and constant presence help the child find a comforting environment even when discovering an unknown place.
It becomes a true link between home and the outside world.
> The swaddle blanket: a concentrate of comfort
Often underestimated, the swaddle blanket is a favorite object for many babies. Its light and breathable material is pleasant to handle, crinkle, and cuddle.
When used regularly at home, the swaddle blanket naturally retains familiar scents that reassure baby during separations.
It easily finds its place:
- in the bed;
- in the daycare bag;
- at the childminder's;
- during journeys.
> A personalized cushion for naps at school
Starting kindergarten represents a new stage. Naps take place in a group environment where it's important for each child to easily find their belongings.
A personalized illustrated cushion with their name then becomes a reassuring landmark.
It accompanies rest times while helping the child easily identify their space.
This personalization also promotes their autonomy from the first days of school.
> Objects that smell like home
Smell is one of the most developed senses in young children.
A comforter or swaddle blanket used daily at home naturally retains this familiar scent.
That's why it's generally advised not to wash the comforter just before starting daycare or a significant change.
This known scent helps the child regain a sense of security when away from their parents.
3) How to prepare for a first separation serenely?
A few simple actions can help baby experience these transitions more easily:
- introduce the new object several weeks before separation;
- let baby naturally choose their favorite companion;
- integrate the comforter or swaddle blanket into bedtime routines;
- avoid changing objects just before starting school/daycare;
- plan for a second identical comforter in case of loss or washing.
Habits reassure toddlers. The more an object is part of their daily life, the more it becomes a true emotional landmark.
4) What if baby rejects their comforter?
Not all children become attached to a comforter.
Some prefer a swaddle blanket, a blanket, a small plush toy, or even a simple piece of fabric.
The essential thing is not the object itself, but the feeling of security it provides. Each child builds their own landmarks at their own pace.
Because the first separations are rich in emotions, we create designs that accompany little ones with gentleness: customizable comforters, cotton maxi swaddle blankets, personalized illustrated cushions for naps at school, and accessories made in our workshop in Hauts-de-France.
Soft materials, exclusive illustrations, and the option to add the child's name make each creation a unique companion, easy to recognize and even more reassuring.
Questions parents often ask
> What object reassures a baby most during separation?
The comforter is generally the most popular transitional object, but some children prefer a swaddle blanket, a small blanket, or a plush toy.
> At what age does a baby become attached to a comforter?
Most babies develop an attachment between 6 and 12 months, though each child develops at their own pace.
> Should the comforter be left at daycare?
Yes, if the establishment allows it. The comforter often helps baby cope better with separation and facilitates falling asleep during nap time.
> Why personalize baby's belongings?
The name makes it easy to find the child's belongings at daycare or school, while reinforcing their sense of belonging and autonomy.
> What to do if baby cries during separation?
Stay calm, establish a small ritual (a hug, a kiss, a few reassuring words) and leave them with their familiar object. With time and consistent routines, these moments generally become more serene.